few thoughts...

just a couple of things on my mind as i anxiously await my brother to arrive from iowa:

1. mike's hard lemonade is gross. bitch at me all you want about it, it is and always will be way too sickeningly sweet to drink casually (and more importantly, excessively). after a night of hard drinking, you don't want to wake up with your tongue feeling like you downed 23 packets of 'lik-m-aid's Fun Dip. if you force down this sugary, syrupy, alcoholic fruit drink simply because you think there are not enough styles and varieties of beer to keep you entertained and inebriated, then you must to send me an email, and i will show you the way of the microbrew.

2. traffic on highways without an accident or construction must be one of the jokes that 'god' plays on us. he/she is sitting somewhere and laughing their ass off...

god: "jesus christ...they're slowing down just cause there's a fucking hill in the road!!"
jesus: "will you shut up! i'm about to get a record time on Mario Kart!"

every day that i drive down rt. 287 to florham park to go to work, there is one bend in the road (to the left...like it matters at all), at which point EVERY CAR decides to completely stop dead on the road. it ends up taking over 10 minutes to go 2/10s of a freakin' mile. every day, some part of me wishes that it's construction, or an accident (not for people to be hurt, but just for SOMETHING to have caused this) and every day, 500 feet after the bend, the cars 'miraculously' start moving at normal speed again. the most bizarre thing of it all is that you can see the place at which the traffic breaks from the spot that you get into it! it's like everyone, every day, just gives up. they have simply accepted that this is going to happen, even though there are no on-ramps or off-ramps in the area, the road doesn't widen or narrow, and there are clearly the same number of cars going around the curve as there are before and after it. this is simply another reason that i cannot become part of the standard mass of 9to5ers.

3. 20 seconds ago, i saw a commerical for burger king's new Triple Whopper. i should end the comment there. but i won't. in the american way, not only is this massively excessive for any type of person, it was marketed because king kong is in theaters. what's the message here? that we should eat like an ape that weighs tens of thousands of pounds? if it's a snack for him, it should be a meal for us? since we're watching a movie about a massive pre-historic beast that we should strive to be one ourselves? i must admit, for the few in my audience, that i have accomplished some eating feats...like the 1 pound burger at fuddruckers (on a dare)...but i regret the choice in a lot of ways, not even considering that i had a worse hangover in the morning from that than i did from my 21st birthday. but, fuddruckers does not market their behemoth burger. bk, on the other hand, might as well pair this with their "enormous omelette sandwich" which packs 1.5 the calories and fat of a big mac....for fuck's sake, there are 1230 calories and 82 grams of fat in a triple whopper. and they are telling the public: "if you like king kong, eat this solidified heart attack!" (sigh)